The Righteous Criminals

Twas the night before Christmas (well four actually) and all about the house, nothing was stirring except a thieving little bugger ransacking.

I was asleep at the time and was rudely awakened several times by loud bangs thumps and rumbles. I assumed of course that this was the normal neighbour noises and rolled back into slumber. My neighbours are as noisy as hell and it often sounds like they are juggling with sideboards etc at 3am.

Suddenly there was a huge big crash which made me leap up and look about, you know like you just had a nightmare and the monster was about to tear you limb from limb. Just then my bedroom door started to slowly open.

In my sleep addled brain I somehow knew that the door shouldn’t be opening as I live alone so I dived towards it shouting expletives. A wiry-looking guy ran down the hall and into the living room where I quickly followed. He leapt out of the window and without hesitation I leapt after him. I chased him along the street, noticing that the creep had my own backpack on stuffed with my goodies.

Suddenly I felt a sharp pain, I had run into glass and could chase no more. I watched him run off into the distance with my goods then realised I was standing naked in the street in the dark and the rain.

The police said that because I couldn’t recognise him and he wore gloves then there is nothing they can do about it and they seemed to blame me for being unable to afford household insurance. I mentioned that if I had caught him then I would have beaten hell out of him, to which I was told I would have been charged with assault.

Apparently few housebreakers are ever caught here – well unless they rob houses of the rich, in which case the statistics raise significantly.

But it made me think of the question, Should it not be the case that if someone breaks into your house then they automatically lose all rights? The person upon breaking into your house is fully aware that he is doing wrong and doesn’t care one jot about your human rights, so it should follow that by law he loses his on point of entry.

The human rights legislation as applied to criminals is a bloody joke if you ask me. I was bemoaning the loss of my digital camera ( a Konica Minolta Dimage A200) as its one of very few things I actually own and although not worth a lot today it cost me a fair bit; when I met an habitual criminal neighbour who proceeded to boast that he had just received a cheque for £2500.

Apparently during one of his stints in the local prison he had to pee in a bucket in his cell at night and then slop out in the morning. The European court of human rights in its infinite wisdom deemed that this was against his human rights and awarded him this money. Personally I think he should be buying me a new camera or at least being forced to hand the money to those he committed his crimes against. What do you think?


About tongnaboot

Just somebody else with time on their hands and a head full of nonsense.
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